Critique Own Work and Others

My own work:

My methods have not changed from semester to semester. If anything I would say that the time and effort that I put in declined. My drafts had a lot less thought and planning to them.  There were some times that I would look over my previous work and know exactly how I would like to improve the essay, where it would be best to work on and how I could make it better only to drop my motivation to do that.

In the most recent essay that I submitted, I failed to created complex paragraphs that built off of multiple sources within the paragraph itself. There was not a clear lead or idea of where I wanted to bring my paper, and the voices that were added in were shallow and did not create depth to the paper.

Before any of my peers had read my draft, I made this in response to a prompt in class:

Editing on: looking at the basic grammar, correction some comma splices, sentence fragments, as well as faulty comparisons. There was some repetition in my writing that I noted and plan to fix before my final draft. The biggest issue that I seemed to have was nonsense sentences. When read, the sentence simply wouldn’t make sense with the words that I had chosen, this led to some of the sentences being rewritten. Nonsense sentences are a typical error for me. There are a lot of times where I will think of a sentence in my head and simply type the words out incorrectly, or I will look away from the screen to type it out. Distractions that pull me from my writing lull and whatever someone says to me will make it onto the paper instead of the thought I was in the middle of. There is also a lack of quotes and speaking from other authors that need to be added in. I lead onto some points but lack the direct communication that will give my claims more weight. That’ll also be worked on between now and the final draft…

Following that, I added on some of the main things that my group would be concerned with in addition to what’s stated previously:

Addition to the point of the title. Culture of hands. Reference the comments, build into that. Japanese potter expand on that, how it applies to life, being a potter. Newcomers, to art in general can sometimes forget the value in things that are already used, they prefer new to old. Add in small section of the hand techniques, probably next to the techniques/strength it takes to actually form the clay. Expand on the conclusion, worth the effort to join.

The first and second drafts of the essays.

My opinion on other people’s work:

There seemed to be two kinds of rough drafts. The ones that have all the parts of the essay and the ones that aren’t…done. The work that people submit in a rough draft can be brutally criticized so much so that the work is completely removed and the idea scrapped.

And while the first batch of essays were a chaotic mess, none of them were so far out there that as a reader, I had no idea what they were talking about. Their essays right off the bat accomplished the main goal; it introduced me a to a discourse in a way that a newcomer would understand. I had a slight advantage in the beginning stages since I knew what a discourse was already, but the fact that I could read and understand the area that my peers were talking about spoke highly of the paper.

I tried to keep my comments limited and sparse, most of the time I would try to focus on only a couple of points a page as I’ve found more than that often leads to a shut down on the author.