Due to some troubles with posting a video, I’ll be posting the short script instead. At least for now.
“We had a peer review of our literacy narratives’ and the basis of what my peers told me was to expand on the points that I made in my reading and writing history. They want more detail and connections throughout the text.
Most of what I heard was that the beginning and the end were strong. And that led me to believe that the middle and where I talk about my old teacher need to be explored a bit more and turned into a more story like setting.
Honestly, when I was initially writing, I debated cutting out the teacher section. But I find that he was an influential part on the writing side of my literacy history. My aunt was the reading but he was the writing. It wouldn’t feel right to cut that side of the story out. So I’ll go back and look for ways to connect it more and create a better flow throughout the piece. Maybe he doesn’t need such a large portion, but I think it’s an important part that needs some recognition.”